Comedy of Errors

It started off as a normal morning, if there is such a thing around a house with 3 small kids. Just doing our usual morning ritual, moving into lunchtime. I decided (after trying to ignore how gross they are) that it was time to wash the kids comforters and blankets. The two of them are notorious for sleeping on top of all their blankets, so their comforters need to be washed often.

I started working on that, and crammed them into our ridiculously tiny washing machine in an effort to save myself two loads and some time. Ran downstairs and started fixing lunch. I was already in trouble with Jericho, who was hollering at me because when he wants food, he wants food 5 minutes ago. So I give him some milk, and start on the kids' sandwiches. (They were mad with me because I decided we were not having pb&j today. But I tried to make up for it by offering the go-gurt we had just bought yesterday at the store.)

As I'm making sandwiches I hear the washer making a weird noise. I run upstairs thinking things just need to be adjusted and life will go on. (I do this all the time, the thing is ridiculously small and I'm ridiculously impatient so I always put too much in...but I thought we had an understanding.) There is water sprayed all over the wall and seeping out on the floor. I fling open the washer and throw towels on the floor to try to soak it up, and hear "OH. NO." from downstairs.

Run down the stairs to find Merrick, the kitchen table, and the chairs in a puddle of chocolate milk. (Jericho is done with his milk and has thrown his cup in the floor and is looking at me like, "where is the meat and potatoes, ma?" And by looking I mean whining loudly.) I send the kids into the living room with their go-gurt, and tell them to sit on the bricks by the fireplace which will be easier to clean should what happened next, in fact, happen. If they stayed on the bricks, that is. They did not. I am in the process of giving Jericho some bread and banana, and finishing up their sandwiches, and cleaning up the chocolate milk spill when I hear "UH. OH." from the living room.

I knew it was go-gurt. I knew it was Merrick. (Spills usually are. When one does martial arts while eating one tends to spill things.) I just didn't know it would be all over the living room like a go-gurt grenade went off. Come to find out, after a little losing-of-the-cool I had managed to keep thus far, Merrick was pretending the go-gurt was a worm, and stomped. on. it. Naturally. So it was literally all over the carpet, the coffee table, the couch, and (drum roll please) the laptop. This was when I wanted to shake my fist at the sky and scream, "WHY?!", but then I realized I still had water all over the upstairs, chocolate milk all over the kitchen, go-gurt all over the living room, and Jericho choking because he stuffs too much food in his mouth at once when left to his own devices, I really didn't want to find out what else could go wrong.

The rest of the story kind of is a blur of Swiffers, towels, Resolve, and clorox wipes. But I did finally get it all cleaned up. And they did all finally actually eat lunch. I think it will be awhile before go-gurt makes a reappearance at the table, however. And a dirty comforter never killed anyone, right?