Outside the Box

Amaryllis had a great time this Christmas. She didn't actually unwrap a single thing, but she has had a blast playing with all the toys people gave her (and unwrapped for her since she wasn't interested). She got several babies that she loves...including a care bear "baby". (We've realized anything she can carry around and snuggle is a baby.) She also got a barn with animals...they are all dogs of course cuz that's the only animal she will say. We need to work on this obviously.



She had a great time playing with the boxes and wrapping paper people threw away as well. This one particular shoe box made for a great seat for watching siblings unwrap things. That is, until she fell out of it. Then it got real. We all experienced the Christmas cheer that is Amaryllis. She knows how to throw a fit...this one was especially festive.


She definitely adds spice to our lives. Next year I'll make sure to get a box with a seatbelt.

Keep This Moment

I'm not usually one for lots of sappy emotions. But there is a particular song l, called Wintersong, I like to listen to around Christmas (ok ok, I'm dating myself when I say it's by Sarah McLachlan) that gets me right in my (very resistant) feels. It goes something like this: "And this is how I see you, In the snow on Christmas morning, Love and happiness surround you, As you throw your arms up to the sky,
I keep this moment by and by." It always reminds me of how fast my babies are growing. And how soon it'll be when they have babies of their own and it's all different for them, but somehow still the same for me. (Meaning you really never stop seeing your babies as just that...your babies.) It reminds me to hold on, tightly but yet still loosely, to this sweet time with these precious souls.


I have taken pictures of them like this since there were only two of them. And the fact that they change, so much, from year to year just does this weird ripping your heart out but also making it explode with love thing. Parenthood...it does just that to a person. I'm grateful for so much about this season of Christmas, but one of the things I'm most grateful for is these four amazing people, how they make me feel so much more love than I ever thought possible, and how they love me back.



(So you can enjoy that same sappy emotion here is the comparison collage) Happy Holidays, everyone! Don't forget to keep these moments.

It's Been Too Long...

...since I managed to take pictures of all four of the kids. It always seems like Amaryllis was napping when I thought about it. Amaryllis napping is a good thing, so you don't want to stop it for sure.

The other day I finally decided I was going to postpone the nap so I could get a picture of all four of the kids. (I really think it has been months since I did this other than with an iPhone.) I managed to get a few good pictures before all you-know-what broke loose. My first mistake was putting a bow on Amaryllis's head. She hates those. She ripped it off several times before we even sat down. I am so glad that I'll have these pictures of the four of them when they are older...I can't get over how fast they have grown even over this last year.

After the first few shots (which thankfully I got a few good ones) Amaryllis was DONE.

You can see her cocking that elbow back...Fancy Pants has had enough of being restrained and is ready to be set free of the cage of photography and bows that she really doesn't want on her head to begin with. Her siblings (Jericho especially) know what's coming.

Merrick, always the kind and sweet big brother, is trying to talk her out of what he knows is coming. Tirzah is just holding on for dear life. Jericho is just making sure to maintain eye-contact with the camera. He knows he has one job and he's sticking to it.

Merrick, for all of his efforts, was the rewarded with one fancy backhand from the littlest sister. (She takes no prisoners.) Jericho, kinda losing the eye contact, but his eyebrow game is on point. This last shot is one of my favorite pictures of my kids...ever. It's not a picture perfect shot for sure, but it's just so typical of life with 4 hood rats. AND...it makes me laugh. So it wins.

I love these kiddos, and I love watching their personalities grow and fill up this house. There are some BIG personalities around here, and I'm grateful that I get to take a few moments now and then to capture them on camera. 

Interpretive Tantrums

Amaryllis is known to be fancy. She has been fancy ever since she was born, as you guys all know. She also likes to do things with flair. She puts all of her effort into whatever it is she's doing, and doesn't prefer to be ignored. All of these traits put together make her one heck of an expert at throwing a fit.

She doesn't just "throw" a fit. She plans out how she's going to make it happen. First, she will look around her for a good spot. She likes to make sure she isn't going to injure herself...an expert fit thrower doesn't just flop down anywhere. Then she commences screaming. (Y'all think I'm making this up. I only wish.) Next, she very carefully lays down/falls into the floor, being sure not to hit her head on the way down. Then she lays there and screams some more. Sometimes, if she's feeling extra angry, she will do this crazy yoga-looking move where she rolls over and into a plank (again, I wish I was kidding), and lifts one leg up in the air. (So she's holding a plank, balancing on her hands and one foot...she should consider starting her own circus act.)

Sometimes, as pictured, she may decide once she's done throwing the fit that we REALLY didn't quite get the point. So she will then go back for round two. (I'll spare you the rundown of that...it usually looks much like round one with the occasional variation like laying on her side and trying to grab anyone who goes too close, or laying spread eagle in the floor in silence for dramatic effect once she's tired of screaming. The silence would be my favorite variation.) She definitely knows how to get her point across, as even her tantrums are fancy. I feel like one day she may have a career in soap operas.

Cuzzies x 6.75

This past week my sister, the only one who lives out of town, was here visiting! She is mucho pregnant with her third baby girl...and due right after Christmas, so traveling will most likely be out of the question. So she was able to come early for a little time to visit since we won't get to over the holidays.

It was really great to see her and her two baby girls...it's been too long. I can't believe how fast they are growing up. And it's really so great to see all the kiddos getting to play together. Some of my best memories as a kid were playing with my cousins, (our kids call each other "the cuzzies") and I love seeing my kiddos get to make those memories too. I just wish we were closer together so that they could play more often. 10 hours is way too far away!

We really miss having this sister (and let's be real, her husband is a pretty cool dude so we miss him too) and these nieces nearby...but are so excited for the time we are able to spend together. I got a feeling we will be seeing each other in the very near future to visit the newest addition to this adorable group of "cuzzies".

Barking and Baby Jesus

Amaryllis has recently started saying more and more words. She actually said "Tirzah" the other day. (For someone who pretends to not be able to talk, in my opinion, they are faking if they can say a word like "Tirzah". Just saying.) One of her new favorite things to say is "woof woof". She thinks most all animals are dogs, and tries to speak their language.



Here we have a video of Amaryllis barking at the nativity scene. I'm thinking she assumed that the camels, sheep, cows, and a donkey are all actually dogs. She also obviously assumes that what's mine is hers, judging from that little angry face at the end of the video when I won't hand over the iPhone. ;)

The Christmas Sessions

It's that time of year where everyone is getting those Christmas cards ready. I have never been good about doing this. I think I sent out Christmas cards one year when I was in college...and that was the end of that. I love getting them, and we always put them on the fridge or hang them somewhere in the house during the season, but don't expect to get a Christmas card from the Barron family. Apologies.

Typically spring and the winter holidays are some of the busier times for my photography. I don't do nearly as much client work as I used to, simply because my life is insanely busy at the present time and it's not always practical to find someone to watch the kids while I work. I always hope to get back into it once the kids are a little bit older because its something I love. But I am incredibly grateful for those people who I regularly see several times a year who let me (and my sister Anna, as well for these sessions) document their families through the seasons.

These sessions were a lot of fun...so many kiddos with great grins, and their parents who I love to catch up with. I don't get to see some of these people except for during sessions, and it's always great to chat and catch up on their lives and see how the kids have grown like weeds. It's like a family reunion sometimes, which makes sessions even less like work and more like fun.

I am always grateful for the chance to spend time with these families, and that they make me a part of their holiday traditions. Looking good, guys! :) Thanks for letting me help capture these memories.

Crazy Runs in the Family

Typically on Thanksgivings in the past Billy and I have gone on long runs together. (Usually half marathon distance, sometimes 10K.) This past year, though, was a little different. I wasnt actually planning on running at all this year just because of how our day worked out, but ended up at the gym instead. (Yes, on Thanksgiving. And yes, it was crowded.) When I got home on a whim I mentioned taking the kids on a short run. They were SO excited, since they are always asking me if they can run with me.

I have run with them in the past, and it's always been kind of a nightmare. But it was always longer, more official, races that were a 5K distance that we ended up mostly walking. This time we just decided to run the route that we typically walk around the neighborhood since I knew at least, should they all decide to revolt, we could walk that far.

They ended up running the whole route...which is about a mile. I was really proud of them! Usually on walks Tirzah complains she has a cramp, or wants to get into the stroller, etc. She did so great, and didn't even ask to stop and walk the whole time. Jericho and Amaryllis were obviously in the stroller...but we did let Jericho out to run the second time we went a few days later. He did great about half the way, then fell into the ditch and scraped his knee and that was the end of that. ;) He howled the whole rest of the way home until we could get him cleaned up. And then he howled some more.

As you can see...they have a flair for the dramatic, and needed to take a nap on the sidewalk after we got back home. Jokes on the boys, though, since their sister looks fresh and ready to run some more. I really had a great time running with them. (I know people think that's crazy. It probably is.) I'm thinking there will be a lot more family "runs" in our future as opposed to just walks. Gotta pass on the crazy genes, right?

Translator Necessary

My youngest two kiddos have not been in any hurry to be conversationalists. Jericho still sometimes requires a little translating. Amaryllis is almost 17 months old, and while she will say a few select words (mama, daddy, bubba -which is brother-, mo-mo -which is milk-, and dodo -which is dog-) she really just points and yells to get what she is after. She honestly doesnt NEED to talk at this point...since the pointing and yelling usually brings one of her older siblings running to get her what she wants. She knows how to work the system. Here is little video of her actually speaking, though. She spent the entire trip to Target yelling about "dodo" that she kept spotting around the store's Christmas decor.

She's pretty adamant about being acknowledged when she does finally say some words. She will get louder and louder until you answer her. So I spent the entire shopping trip saying, "Yeah! DoDo!" Babies definitely have a way of making you look like a Dodo in public. ;)

Fresh Cuts

Yesterday morning was a typical Monday. I woke up with that kind of "here we go again" feeling...with 5 days of me vs. 4 kiddos ahead of me. (I love them, y'all know this...but they sure do wear a girl out.) Monday are often tough days around here, just getting settled back into our school routine and getting everyone going somewhat the same general direction. I figured this Monday would be no different than the usual Monday as far as our routine goes.

But when Merrick and Jericho got up for the day, I noticed the two of them were literally looking like sheepdogs. I had noticed they needed haircuts but had been putting it off for as long as I could since I always have to drag 4 children into the hair salon to get it done. But I decided there was no more putting it off. We finished up school by about 11, and headed to the gym planning to go straight to get haircuts afterwards. (With a pit stop at target in between the two.)

About halfway through my run this morning I remembered that the 3 older kids had dentists appointments that afternoon. Being the type of person that I am, I had made a plan and I was sticking to it. We were getting those haircuts and getting our teeth cleaned. And we did. It wasnt necessarily pretty, but we made it with a little help from a drive-thru known as McDonald's. (The absolute best bribing token I have when it comes to making hooligans behave. Happy Meals get them every time.)

It ended up being a really good day. The two boys just kill me with their handsomeness, and I can't resist their charms (which is code for shenanigans) with those fresh hair cuts. I try to keep it down, but I really don't know how I got so lucky to be mama to these two good looking boys. The visit to the dentist was surprisingly awesome. No one cried or tried to claw their way out of the chair. The dentist even went so far as to tell me that he didn't know how I managed to keep all those kids teeth that clean. (I really can take no credit for this...I'm lucky if they are all fed and dressed, much less manage to brush their teeth. Just keepin it real, y'all.)

It was crazy busy, and I didn't really even sit down until 5pm. But I don't think I'd mind if more Mondays went something like this. And it doesn't hurt that these two guys thanked me for the haircuts (which I also had nothing to do with other than chauffeuring) and told me I was "the best". I'll take it, Monday.

On Not Leaving the Leaves

In the past we've never really had to deal too much with a yard full of leaves. We've always rented, and in past locations there either weren't many trees or the landscapers took care of it. This house is a different story on both counts. TONS of leaves and we are the landscapers. The kids totally don't mind though. The leaves have proved to be fun for everything from hiding/fort building to padding for jumping off of various items in the backyard. You know how the hooligans roll.

I spent about an hour and a half raking up most of the leaves in the backyard one day last week. I think, though I got the majority of them, there are quite a few left to go. The kiddos were just a tiny bit annoyed with me for cleaning up "their" leaves. My apologies of course, but I couldn't find you when you went out in the backyard anymore.

I've seen a lot of posts going around Facebook and on the news about how we should leave the leaves, and that it's good for the ecosystem and all that green stuff. (Not that I'm opposed to green stuff.) Their reasons that this is a good idea include: slugs and bugs and creepy crawly things need places to live/hide, and turtles and snakes need places to live. I'm sorry guys, but in trying to convince me to leave the leaves in my yard you should have left out the part where you tell me bugs and snakes will surely enjoy living in them. I might have been convinced otherwise. ;)

We were actually offered a blower to borrow for leaf-roundup part two...which will make my job of ridding the yard of potential snake and bug-habitats a lot easier. (I know, I feel equal parts awful and equal parts totally justified in saying I have no desire to let snakes find a suitable residence in my yard.) I just hope that the kids, and their leaf-fort building shenanigans, will eventually forgive me for what I am about to do.

Feyonce

Late this past summer one of my younger sisters got engaged. She and I have always been told how much we look alike, and have called each other "sistatwin" for years. (My own husband has confused the two of us in pictures and from a short distance.) There are quite a few years between us in age, but she and I have become closer and closer as the years go by and the age difference seems to matter less than when I was a teenager and she was still an annoying little munchkin. ;)

Her engagement was a sweet event where her fiancé (she calls herself his "feyonce", because it's fancier to add a little Queen B to anything, right?) got the whole family involved and we were all able to be there and see the proposal. So it was fitting that we were a part of their engagement session as well, and two of us sisters were able to shoot it for them. It was bittersweet for me to do this session, as I can't quite believe how old we are both getting. ;) But really...I am so proud of her, and was so honored to be able to do this session.

Sistatwin, I am so grateful for you in my life. I am also grateful for the good man you have found to share your life with, and the fact that he doesn't mind helping babysit the hooligans definitely gives him a lot of cool points in my book. So excited to see this next chapter of their lives unfold, and that they have let us all be such a huge part of it!

Spirit Week?

I always see parents posting about it being spirit week at their kids' school. They dress up in all kinds of crazy outfits with different themes. I realized, seeing these pictures, that must be what my kids are going for on a daily basis. Spirit week...let's just go with that.

They rarely show up to breakfast in the morning not wearing something ridiculous. We all know about Tirzah's outfit choices. While the boys typically start their day dressed as some type of superhero. (Halloween not necessary.) The other day they all went to the gym in their halloween costumes. I don't even think I noticed until we were halfway to the gym, and even at that point I decided I didnt really care. Yolo, right? I figure the day will come when it's not acceptable to go out in public dressed as Cinderella...today is not that day for the hooligans.

I guess I've just decided it's best to appreciate the fact that they are trying to add a little "spirit" into my week. The weeks get long (but somehow still so fast) as a homeschooling mom. It's hard work, being with kids all day...even though it's what I choose to do and enjoy. I am more excited for Fridays and the weekend now than I was when it was me in school. (And I never would have thought that I would be looking for excuses to get out of the house and see people. But I guess that's what being a SAHM does to even an introvert.) But my life would be way more bland if it weren't for the hooligans filling my weeks with shenanigans...and they always dress the part.

The Great 8

Y'all...how is my baby 8 years old today? It seems like just the other day I remember excitedly driving to the hospital ready to meet him. (Little did I know it would be a whole 20 something hours later...but it was well worth the wait and the emergency c-setion.) I thought I would have no trouble transitioning into being a mom...I had 5 younger siblings and knew all about how to handle babies and change diapers. What I didn't know was how much different it is to be a mom than a big sister to 5.

Becoming a mom was the best thing that ever happened to me. I've been stretched in ways I didnt know possible...more exhausted than imaginable...and felt more overwhelming love than I know I ever could have possibly deserved. I'm so grateful for this baby boy who was the first to fill up my heart. I cannot believe he's lived 8 years already...they've flown by way faster than I'd like to admit.

He doesn't look like a little boy anymore. He's starting to have that goofy older kid look and the mind of his own to go with it. He is every day growing into more and more of his own person, and it breaks my heart and makes me so proud all in the same breath. How to learn to let go while still giving him all he needs to face the world is a tall order, but I'm ever so grateful that I was the one chosen to do that. That I was the one chosen to be his mom. I can't imagine being anything else.

Merrick Wilder is so many things. He is fun. He is literally the sweetest boy I know. He cares for others. He never stops climbing and running and jumping and moving. He looks like his daddy. He will be the first to comfort me if I'm upset...rubbing my back and tucking my hair behind my ear. He constantly makes me laugh with the unique way his mind works. He wants to be a good man...he is already a good man. He loves his God and his family. He is irreplaceable and has taught me so much about love.

I always say this, but I mean it so much. I know birthdays are about the person having one, but I can't ever help but feel like I'm the one who is getting the gift on my kids' birthdays. No gift I could wrap up and give to you today, Boogie, would ever compare to the gift I was given when you were born. I am so grateful and humbled to be your mom, and I love you more than I can say. I'm so proud of you, and can't wait to see how you grow this next year! Happy 8th birthday, Merrick Wilder!

Game Face

As a homeschooling mom of 4, sometimes it takes serious effort to spend one on one time with all of the kids. (I know, I'm home with them all day long...but that's not quite the same as spending quality time with them.) The older two get a lot more focused attention relating to school, but a lot of times Jericho in particular gets lost in the shuffle.

He was such a chill baby, that it was even easier to kind of let him do his thing and not have to worry about him. (Amaryllis as we all know, demands attention and doesn't care what you think about it.) As he's gotten a little older, though, I can tell he's needing more good attention by the amount of time he spends looking for negative attention if you know what I mean. (What sibling can I irritate to tears today?) So recently I've been trying to make sure and put genuine effort into just spending time playing with him.

The other day he asked me to play Guess Who? with him. (Superhero edition, of course.) So I wasnt about to say no. We played several rounds...most of which involved him not following any of the rules are even seeming to be aware there are rules to Guess Who?, but I think it was a success. I know one day this little big guy will be asking me for the keys to the car instead of asking me to chat with him every night before bed...so I think spending more time with him (and all the other hooligans as well) is a win/win. Even if I have to lose a few times at a board game.

Fancy Faces

Nothing too elaborate to say over here right now. It's been the typical busy yet, well typical, kind of week so far already. I always feel like the days crawl but the weeks fly by when I look back. It's tricky, that living life business. But I'm always thankful for the fact that the majority of my time is spent with people I really really like.


Here is one example of "people I really like." She's recently noticed she can make people laugh by doing silly things, like that face in the middle picture. The older hooligans give her standing ovations for so much as sneezing...so it it any surprise she finds herself hilarious? ;) She doesn't lack for personality that's for daggone sure, but come to think of it none of the hooligans do.


At least my seemingly long days are filled with these faces. There isn't much I would rather see. Except occasionally the back of my eyelids.

Independently Cheesy

At our house we are attempting to raise independent individuals. That means things like letting them fix their own lunch...and the mess that typically goes with it. Letting them dress themselves...and the interesting wardrobe choices that go with it. (Within reason...I do occasionally put my foot down.) Letting them do their laundry...and the spilled detergent that is now all over the laundry room. You get the picture.

I know that one day it will be worth it, and I will be glad I let them try and do things for themselves. I just have to struggle through all the trauma that this gives my neat-freak soul. And also make sure they eat their vitamins, since sometimes if I don't catch them in time their lunches look something like this:

Here we have what Tirzah calls a cheese sandwich. She has even covered all the bases by making sure the "bread" is also cheese, technically cheez-its. Go big or go home, right?

Introductions

Back in the Spring, our oldest two kiddos had made their own personal decision to become Christ followers. We have talked to them about our faith often, and it's something that is a big part of our  home...but also something that we very much wanted to let them decide on their own without any pushing from us. It's obviously a very personal decision, so I was thrilled when the two of them told me they believed and wanted to take the next step. 

Our church recently had planned to have a baptism service, which was open to whoever wanted to participate. We asked the kiddos if they wanted to do this, and if they understood what it meant, etc. They both said that they did, and were so excited about it. We spent a lot of time talking to the two of them and listening to their thoughts about the whole process. Kids have such an amazing perspective on things...and seeing them walk through this for themselves has been such a heart-renewing experience for me. 

As a mom, there is nothing more you could want for your children than to see them grow to be people who love, people who are devoted and loyal to their friends and family and what they believe, and who see the bigger picture that exists outside of themselves. I'm so proud of these two kids. They have their struggles like we all do, and some days I feel like I'm failing them in so many ways, but hearing their hearts through this process has made me realize more than ever what beautiful souls they have. They love, and they care, and they get it...sometimes way more than I do. They love their Savior and the people around them, and they amaze me more all the time. 

I am so honored to have been able to be a part of this, and to be able to walk beside them as they grow and learn. I know as a mom you always worry if you are doing right by your kids, giving them what they need, teaching them all they need to know, preparing them for the life ahead, loving them completely and knowing them better than anyone. I readily admit that I am not capable of doing this as well as I would like to, but I am so glad to have been able to introduce them to the One who can. 

Like Arrows

It's no secret that Billy and I both love a good tattoo. We both have several, some big some small, and several we are dreaming about/planning, etc. I have always wanted to get a tattoo to represent my kiddos. They are *5* of the most important people in my life...so it's always something I've thought about.

I had thought about various ideas and ways to symbolize them over the years...but nothing really stuck with me or seemed like something I wanted permanently on my body. One day I had been scrolling through instagram and a particular runner I follow was showing off his new tattoo. It was a bunch of arrows that represented his kids, drawing from verses 3-4 in Psalm 127: "Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth." I loved that idea and way of symbolizing my kids, and it was finally an idea that seemed right when I thought of them.

I am not the least bit artistic, so I knew I was going to have to rely on someone else to draw it for me obviously. I really admire the artwork that is done by the same artist who designed Billy's half-sleeve, so when I was finally ready to go for it I scheduled the appointment with him and gave him my idea which I trusted him to visualize/draw his own way. I didn't want it to look like a tattoo I'd already seen, but something unique.

The only guidelines I gave him was that I wanted five arrows to represent each of our babies (whether here with us or in Heaven)...and I wanted it to be as colorful as possible. He didn't disappoint. It isn't anything like the tattoo that I originally saw on instagram, but the idea behind it is the same...which I love. I love wearing this visible representation of what my kids mean to me on my arm. They are truly a reward and my heritage, and one of the greatest blessings I will ever receive. It's also a plus that they love when mommy gets a new tattoo...so they love that this one is all about them. ;)