First, let me warn you. I am ranting just a bit. I recently ran across a blog post, on a popular blog, about breastfeeding. *Aaand all male readers just ran screaming. Sorry, I gotta get this off my chest. Uh, sorry, I typed that and thought about it later.* It was talking about Giselle's recent statements about making breastfeeding a law. (And more recently I've been hearing about the formula recalls) When I first heard that...I considered hunting down Giselle and, well, never mind. I was mad. Pretty stinkin mad.
I think I was mostly mad because I felt judged for my decision NOT to nurse. *And yes, I heard the collective gasp of mothers all across the internet.* I tried with M, no workey. 3 months of pain, crying, starving skinny baby, postpartum depression made worse by hours of shutting myself away with a newborn who was starving and making me feel like I was physically
on fire. I didn't even try with Tirzah...I didn't want to go through all that with
her too. I just wanted to
enjoy her and not dread
feeding her.
While doing what
other people said was right for me and my son, I was miserable. He was hungry...I was depressed and in pain. I learned to hate it. Maybe it was partially my fault. Maybe I didn't try hard enough. Maybe I wasn't stubborn enough. Maybe I was a sissy...yes, someone had the nerve to call me a sissy. After 20+ hours of natural labor, including 3 hours of pushing, followed by an emergency c-section, I'm pretty darn sure I'm no sissy.
I finally made a decision that made some people look down their noses at me. And I don't regret it. After I quit we were both fat and happy. Well, HE was fatter...I was just happier. I didn't resent him when he wanted to eat, and didn't dread that time spent with him, I was able to enjoy being his mother and be in a better frame of mind. How...please tell me, is that a selfish decision?
There are things that all of us, moms included, judge other people for. And many of them are things that in the long run have no bearing on raising children who love God and the people around them. There
are things that are non-negotiable, stealing/lying/murder/running out of chocolate *kidding* are wrong no matter
who you are, but nursing/not nursing doesn't make you a bad mom. You can nurse until your child graduates from college but if you aren't teaching them good values, and modeling those values, then you'll just have a breast-fed jerk.
But I am realizing that as much as I felt it was best
for my baby for me to not nurse, and I feel it's best for them to be vaccinated *another hot button issue*, that same decision is not black and white, wrong or right, and will be viewed and decided differently by another mother. It's my job to raise and protect my kids, and to sincerely follow God's leading as to how to go about that.
As it should be. I am responsible for my decisions, as is everyone else.
And it's also my job to
not judge people for their decisions...no matter how ridiculous I think it may be. ;) Hey, I've got enough jobs around here to keep me busy.
I think I was mostly mad because I felt judged for my decision NOT to nurse. *And yes, I heard the collective gasp of mothers all across the internet.* I tried with M, no workey. 3 months of pain, crying, starving skinny baby, postpartum depression made worse by hours of shutting myself away with a newborn who was starving and making me feel like I was physically on fire. I didn't even try with Tirzah...I didn't want to go through all that with her too. I just wanted to enjoy her and not dread feeding her.
While doing what other people said was right for me and my son, I was miserable. He was hungry...I was depressed and in pain. I learned to hate it. Maybe it was partially my fault. Maybe I didn't try hard enough. Maybe I wasn't stubborn enough. Maybe I was a sissy...yes, someone had the nerve to call me a sissy. After 20+ hours of natural labor, including 3 hours of pushing, followed by an emergency c-section, I'm pretty darn sure I'm no sissy.
I finally made a decision that made some people look down their noses at me. And I don't regret it. After I quit we were both fat and happy. Well, HE was fatter...I was just happier. I didn't resent him when he wanted to eat, and didn't dread that time spent with him, I was able to enjoy being his mother and be in a better frame of mind. How...please tell me, is that a selfish decision?
There are things that all of us, moms included, judge other people for. And many of them are things that in the long run have no bearing on raising children who love God and the people around them. There are things that are non-negotiable, stealing/lying/murder/running out of chocolate *kidding* are wrong no matter who you are, but nursing/not nursing doesn't make you a bad mom. You can nurse until your child graduates from college but if you aren't teaching them good values, and modeling those values, then you'll just have a breast-fed jerk.
But I am realizing that as much as I felt it was best for my baby for me to not nurse, and I feel it's best for them to be vaccinated *another hot button issue*, that same decision is not black and white, wrong or right, and will be viewed and decided differently by another mother. It's my job to raise and protect my kids, and to sincerely follow God's leading as to how to go about that. As it should be. I am responsible for my decisions, as is everyone else.
And it's also my job to not judge people for their decisions...no matter how ridiculous I think it may be. ;) Hey, I've got enough jobs around here to keep me busy.
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